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Author Topic: Word Gender  (Read 869 times)

Charlemagne 8

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Word Gender
« on: April 02, 2002, 04:15:04 pm »

In regards to the gender of certain words as discussed in a previous thread that I can't find, I offer the following fully plagarized list:

SWISS ARMY KNIFE: Male, because even though it appears useful for a wide variety of work, it spends most of its time just opening bottles.

KIDNEYS: Female, because they always go to the bathroom in pairs.

TIRE: Male, because it goes bald and often is over-inflated.

HOT AIR BALLOON: Male, because to get it to go anywhere you have to light a fire under it. . . and, of course, there's the hot air part.

SPONGES: Female, because they are soft and squeezable and retain water.

WEB PAGE: Female, because it is always getting hit on.

SHOE: Male, because it is usually unpolished, with its tongue hanging out.

COPIER: Female, because once turned off, it takes a while to warm up. Because it is an effective reproductive device when the right buttons are pushed. Because it can wreak havoc when the wrong buttons are pushed.

ZIPLOC BAGS: Male, because they hold everything in, but you can always see right through them.

SUBWAY: Male, because it uses the same old lines to pick people up.

HOURGLASS: Female, because over time, the weight shifts to the bottom.

HAMMER: Male, because it hasn't evolved much over the last 5,000 years, but it's handy to have around.

REMOTE CONTROL: Female. . . Ha!. . . you thought I'd say male. But consider, it gives a man pleasure, he'd be lost without it, and while he doesn't always know the right buttons to push, he keeps trying.
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sekim

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RE:Word Gender
« Reply #1 on: April 02, 2002, 04:25:20 pm »

CVIII

You are just asking for trouble.

>HOURGLASS: Female, because over time, the weight shifts to the bottom

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Charlemagne 8

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RE:Word Gender
« Reply #2 on: April 02, 2002, 04:33:35 pm »

Yeah, I had reservations about that one, too. But if you're going to steal something, steal the whole thing.
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Callithumpian

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RE:Word Gender
« Reply #3 on: April 02, 2002, 05:57:43 pm »

Punctuate the following sentence:

a woman without her man is nothing
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