Thanks... upon further investigating I find I can make it work by changing the TVs speaker setting form external speaker to TV speaker. By doing this and using 3.5 audio out jack on the TV to my amp it seems I can have my cake and eat it too. Great stuff!
Aha. So you are saying that the digital audio output from the TV to the AVR did
not have any DLNA volume adjustment applied to it, whereas the analog audio output
does have the volume adjustments applied to it?
So is your AVR also connected to the TV via an HDMI cable? Because, if so you could try enabling HDMI CEC controls on both devices, and reverting to the digital audio output. It might be the case that the TV would then forward the DLNA volume commands onwards to the AVR by means of the HDMI CEC commands. (For example, this is what happens between my Sony TV and my Yamaha AVR).