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[JimH]

Girl chimps learn faster than boys

A study of wild chimpanzees has provided evidence that girls have been faster learners than boys for six million years.

Researchers discovered clear gender differences in the way that young male and female chimps learn skills from their mothers.

The findings, published in the journal Nature, mirror the contrasts in the learning abilities of human children, say the scientists behind the study.

Professor Elizabeth Lonsdorf, of the Lincoln Park Zoo in Chicago, said females spent more time closely watching their mother, but male chimps had shorter attention spans and spent more time wrestling with one another and swinging in trees.

[KingSparta]

but male chimps had shorter attention spans

It happens to me when my wife talks to me, i kind of zone out.

so i know i must be related to a Chimp or two

[pipsqueak]

jim

i read something similar a while back.

it basically said that adult females are better at reading emotions and empathising because they spent more time observing the mothers face while they were still young. Males, on the other hand, are boorish insensitive morons because were too focussed on tonka trucks, starting fires, hitting things and the like...

[im not sure where i read this, maybe in a letter from an ex flame of mine...]

[Matt]

It's funny because I was at the park last night with some friends, and for no good reason decided to climb a tree and swing upside down.  Guess I really am a monkey...

[Robert Taylor]

I like eating bananas...

[Havana]

Hurry and delete this thread before it e gets out to the females!!  I couldn't handle this being rubbed in my face!  lol

[urlwolf]

Hurry and delete this thread before it e gets out to the females!!  I couldn't handle this being rubbed in my face!  lol

They know. They use their superior abilties at reading emotions and empathising to basically be always a step ahead of us

[gpvillamil]

It's funny because I was at the park last night with some friends, and for no good reason decided to climb a tree and swing upside down.  Guess I really am a monkey...

Must have something to do with working too much on APE.

[skidoo]

A smarter monkey is still a monkey.

I may be an insensitive clod with a lower relative IQ, but at least I know I'm a dunce, a la Lamark and Darwin.

If I'm a giraffe, it's my wife's fault. Right? Right?! Somebody back me up here!

[DocLotus]

Women Can Be Very Smart...

The big asteroid finally hits and everybody on earth dies and goes to heaven. God comes and says, "I want the men to make two lines. One line for the men that dominated their women on earth and the other line for the men that were dominated by their women. Also, I want all the women to go with St. Peter."

With that said and done, the next time God looked, the women are gone and there are two lines.

The line of the men that were dominated by their women was 1,000 miles long, and in the line of men that dominated their women, there was only one man. God got mad and said, "You men should be ashamed of yourselves. I created, you in my image and you were all whipped by your mates. Look at the only one of my sons that stood up and made me proud. Learn from him! Tell them my son, how did you manage to be the only one in this line?"

The man replies, "My wife told me to stand here."

[DocLotus]

Men Can Be Smart Too...

An old man lived alone in Idaho. He wanted to spade his potato garden, but it was very hard work. His only son, Bubba, who used to help him, was in prison. The old man wrote a letter to his son and described his predicament.

Dear Bubba:
I am feeling pretty bad because it looks like I won't be able to plant my potato garden this year. I'm just getting too old to be digging up a garden plot. If you were here, all my troubles would be over. I know you would dig the plot for me.
Love, Dad

A few days later, he received a letter from his son.

Dear Dad:
For heaven's sake, Dad, don't dig up that garden. That's where I buried the BODIES.
Love, Bubba

At 4 a.m. the next morning, FBI agents and local Police showed up. They dug up the entire garden area without finding any bodies. They apologized to the old man and left. That same day, the old man received another letter from his son.

Dear Dad:
Go ahead and plant the potatoes now. It's the best I could do under the circumstances.
Love, Bubba

[DocLotus]

HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED:

Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me, "You're next."

They all stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals  

[KingSparta]

DocLotus

hehehe, thats what i keep telling our sales team most of them are in there 60's one is 69 years old.

I keep collecting boxes to put his stuff in so he will retire.

[DocLotus]

Glad you liked it

[JustinChase]

I keep collecting boxes to put his stuff in so he will retire.

Not long skinny pine boxes, I hope