User livelistenlearn posted this on
ComputerAudiophile.com. Posted here for your enjoyment. It made me laugh.
----------
in reference to the serious posts in this other thread*:
$10,000 Ethernet cable promises BONKERS MP3 audio experience having scoured through other recent thought-provoking threads, kindly allow me to propose several sound reasons as to why one may fail to appreciate the efficacy of a $10k ethernet cable:
1) your high-res files are not high-res enough. DSD was good yesterday. today, you need at least DSF and MQA. spend more. test extensively, lest ye be branded as a recalcitrant, stubborn old coot, time-trapped in the vinyl and/or CDDA era of the 70s or 80s or 90s < kindly tick whichever is applicable.
2) your gear is not good enough. reflect on the 10% rule of thumb = to adequately justify a $10k cable in your system, the total net amortised value of all your gear in one listening system should be worth at least $100k in 2015 dollars. that million-dollar system that you have assembled over the years may not be good enough. because audio technology has moved on = today’s ethernet cables were not designed to work with yesterday’s tubes.
3) your listening room is not good enough. build an anechoic chamber that exceeds iso1 cleanroom standards with a vacuum diffusion pump and hepa/ulna filters. accept that sub-atomic particles (real and hypothetical) might still theoretically affect the transmissions of sound waves in your chamber. nevertheless, decontaminate and de-toxify yourself religiously before entering naked. and, try not to breathe when you listen.
4) your ears are not good enough. not to question anyone’s audiophile credentials but taking out your eyes is too extreme.
instead, consider bat ear transplants. remember: you need to get a pair for balanced input. stereo and 3D sound-staging is for amateurs, what you really need is echolocation or biosonar. when you become “batman”, you will ace DBTs with complete aplomb.
5) your brain is not good enough. train your brain to think that nothing is impossible. believe in every unproven or inexplicable phenomena and belief system. better still, create and propagate a belief system of your own because anything is possible.
if you wish to contribute to the future human gene pool, always be vigilant, imaginative and productive. the next time you hear a rustle in the grass do not limit the possibilities to wind or an existing predator. why not imagine dragons? with this in mind, boldly go forth and reproduce like rabbits so that one of your future off-spring may eventually evolve into batman - see above.
6) you are old, perhaps even lonely, and at times, need little blue pills to attain audible results. here in CA, serious scientific work is in progress to resolve this issue. you are encouraged to discuss and debate until a suitable solution is found. apparently, even the most perfect bit-perfect software player on this planet will not help you. NVM if the definitive solution is not uncovered in your lifetime. at least you tried. and, hopefully, had some fun along the way in good company. as well as nice wine, single malt or whatever your “poison” may be.
carefully and conscientiously address all the ^, and if you still cannot fully appreciate the power of a highest-end ethernet cable, then apply Occam’s Razor. which will inevitably bring you to the conclusion that your specific cable is what some people call a “lemon”, when clearly what you need is an “apple”.
send it back immediately. request for a replacement. asking for a refund implies that you give up. no true-blue CA-er ever gives up.
more good news: when you finally hear the difference, there is still the next challenge to look forward to = convincing the world that you can, and everybody else should.
to succeed in this great life mission, take Commander Spock’s good advice = “live long and prosper”. as we all know, Spock’s credentials are impeccable – he has served as Science Officer aboard the Starship Enterprise for 49 years. please also consider his ears and how young he looks these days... which explain why he even has an attractive girlfriend who speaks fluent Klingon = one of the languages frequently employed in CA to discuss the issue of digital jitter.
cheers