We have struggled with similar questions in our household.
The main computer has the songs and the database.
Another computer is the main "tagging" system, which access the songs and database via the network.
But the other computers in the house, well, we don't access the main computer via Media Server because then we can't tag files wherever we are and we need to 'rate-as-we-go'.
Our workaround: VNC. We VNC into the main computer, whose output is in the living room stereo. It's just like being at the main computer, but remotely. Of course, I always worry that other computers in the house have the main library open; so I have to remember to go close all running copies of MC just in case, which is a real pain.
And sometimes VNC is really slow. Then I go to option b: create a new library on the kitchen computer, clone the main one, and try real hard to remember not to make any database changes. Because while it is true I can update tags then just use "update my library from the tags", I'm not sure my older tags are right, and I don't want to overwrite anything in my database just yet.